Sunday, June 21, 2009

Choices and Being Conscious

This is just a quick little jotting on an observation I made today (at least I think I made this observation; I'm still fleshing it out in my head.)

There's something about the awareness that what you do is a CHOICE that leads to a higher consciousness about your life. I know I'm on the verge of a discovery with this one, it's just on the tip of my mind, like when a word is on the tip of your tongue.

I've always been attracted to people (not romantically, but in that I-want-to-be-around-you-all-the-time-and-learn-from-you sort of way) who own their choices and who don't whine about being put-upon (even when I'm whining TO them) and who stop when they've had enough and don't overextend themselves. (And when they do overextend themselves, they don't act like martyrs, but instead know that they were the ones who made the choice to overextend themselves, even if it didn't feel like it at the moment.)

Add that attraction and impression of others to what I'm learning about parenting, where offering choices to a very strong-willed toddler is often the only way to make peace in any given situation, and I'm learning how strong the power of choice is.

The trick is, we have to acknowledge and own that WE CHOOSE. I'm reminded of the Sex and the City episode where Charlotte yells, "I choose my choice! I choose my choice!"

I think the thing that is unfortunate (and, to be honest, irritating to me -- which I know also means something) about people who don't acknowledge that their own choices have contributed to their life situation is that they're just going through life so unconscious of what is happening to them. I probably see a decent amount of myself in them, which is the cause for my irritation, and it's also because of my constant striving to be conscious, which of course is not foolproof.

So, the bottom line to this long and winding post...I'm committing to watching myself make the choices I make, and to take ownership for those choices; I think this will lead to even greater consciousness in my life and awareness of the things that I do, and the knowledge that the choices I've made have brought me to where I am today.

If you feel like, let me know what you think, and if I'm on the right track or not!


Songbird said...

I'm glad you mentioned this on Twitter, didn't realize you had a blog! If you find it really remains a habit, there is a UCC webring and of course my pet project, RevGalBlogPals.
I would agree that the most irritating thing about the unconsciousness of other people is the mirror they provide for our own unconscious behavior. But if we see it and want to change it in ourselves, that's something.

Icy said...

I think you are right on and I appreciate you writing. Just the awareness that we HAVE choices starts this growth process. We all think we know that, but with all the blaming, resentment of others for not doing right by us etc, it is easy to lose site of the fact that our own choices are involved. As you say with "Never perfect, always real," this is not an instance of asking ourselves to always make the right choice, it is about recognition that we have a stake in the process of our lives. We have a choice.

Sarah said...

Thank you Songbird and Icy for stopping by and commenting! I appreciate you reading my post and taking the time to leave a comment :)