This is just a quick little jotting on an observation I made today (at least I think I made this observation; I'm still fleshing it out in my head.)
There's something about the awareness that what you do is a CHOICE that leads to a higher consciousness about your life. I know I'm on the verge of a discovery with this one, it's just on the tip of my mind, like when a word is on the tip of your tongue.
I've always been attracted to people (not romantically, but in that I-want-to-be-around-you-all-the-time-and-learn-from-you sort of way) who own their choices and who don't whine about being put-upon (even when I'm whining TO them) and who stop when they've had enough and don't overextend themselves. (And when they do overextend themselves, they don't act like martyrs, but instead know that they were the ones who made the choice to overextend themselves, even if it didn't feel like it at the moment.)
Add that attraction and impression of others to what I'm learning about parenting, where offering choices to a very strong-willed toddler is often the only way to make peace in any given situation, and I'm learning how strong the power of choice is.
The trick is, we have to acknowledge and own that WE CHOOSE. I'm reminded of the Sex and the City episode where Charlotte yells, "I choose my choice! I choose my choice!"
I think the thing that is unfortunate (and, to be honest, irritating to me -- which I know also means something) about people who don't acknowledge that their own choices have contributed to their life situation is that they're just going through life so unconscious of what is happening to them. I probably see a decent amount of myself in them, which is the cause for my irritation, and it's also because of my constant striving to be conscious, which of course is not foolproof.
So, the bottom line to this long and winding post...I'm committing to watching myself make the choices I make, and to take ownership for those choices; I think this will lead to even greater consciousness in my life and awareness of the things that I do, and the knowledge that the choices I've made have brought me to where I am today.
If you feel like, let me know what you think, and if I'm on the right track or not!